Since I was a child, I have had a fascination with twins. Is it really possible? To share a womb with another person and grow with that person and share every breathing moment (except for when one comes too early or leaves too late) with that person? Twins are a living example of miracles, in my opinion. The first thing I said when someone asked me "What do you want to be when you are older?" was, "a mother." I bet the second was, "A mother to twins." That isn't the story for today, though. I think because I knew I had a long way to go as a child (when it comes to being a mother), I just befriended many instead to fill the twin void.
There was Zoe and Zara, the twins in our basement who I apparently stuck to like glue. And then the twins at House Number 9, whom I remember playing outside with. And then my really cool, twin friends. Who I shall not name because they are too cool for you. I didn't squeeze my way into their lives because they were twins, but these things come naturally. Somewhere, somehow, I became great friends with them and I can't explain it...
There is one correlation I can make to this. The concept of Love Languages. Love Languages explains that there are 5 ways we express love, through Spending Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Receiving Gifts, and Words of Affirmation. For every person, there is a main way they like to receive love. That is why these 5 can be ranked, from your greatest form of accepting love to least. Of course, everyone has a need for all forms, but each person has one way they prefer more. If you are able to understand your own preferred language, you can understand other's, too! That way, you can improve your relationships and love people not only in the way they deserve, but in the way they want to be loved. (I've attached the Love Languages Quiz below!)
As I was explaining, I believe I like twins because my highest ranked Love Language is Spending Quality Time. What I found interesting was Words of Affirmations is the least, even though I enjoy art forms expressed through words or writing. That might just be the point. I surround myself with words, dictionaries, and speeches on a daily, so I am able to see how easily words can be expressed. Whereas with Spending Quality Time, I am receiving something immeasurable: someone's time. Quality time doesn't mean doing activities or going shopping, it's the mere sitting with a friend or sibling and talking, without any distractions. It's discussing problems and solutions and eating store-bought cookies. It's everything I can get with twins because they're already siblings, already sharing a close bond. When I am allowed into their space, there's a whole lot of quality time to go around.
I still love my friends who aren't twins! My favorite memories with my friends is when we gather at someone's house and retell stories about the elementary days, (J.J. squad, is that you?) and laughter fills the air, or when we sit in the car in front of my house at 12:00am crying because one of us is leaving to Sakuantchi (Saskatchewan).
What I love about this quiz (haha, get it?) is that it teaches you something you don't think you need to learn. Whenever we meet someone new we want to know their favorite books, t.v. shows, or their studies, but we never stop to analyze how they want to be loved. I have had conversations with people about this concept, and the one's who've applied it see a great difference in their relationships. Hope it can be of benefit to you, too!
May Peace be Upon You, Asalamu Alaykum!
"O you who have believed, do not put [yourselves] before Allah and His Messenger but fear Allah. Indeed, Allah is Hearing and Knowing." - Quran 49:1 (Sahih International)
"The best among you are those who have the best manners and character." - Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)
"I am not what happened to me, I am what I chose to become." - Carl Jung
"The function of leadership is to create more leaders, not followers." - Ralph Nader
"You have never had to steal my breath or take it away, somehow you have always managed to convince me to hand it over freely." - Tyler Knott Gregson
"These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb." - Najwa Zebian
"I finally understand that I do not write, I leak." - Tyler Knott Gregson
"I am too little butter on too much bread. I am too many thoughts in too little head." - Tyler Knott Gregson
"How can land be owned by another man...is the sky owned by birds and the river owned by fish." - Lupe Fiasco
"Who you are, what you think, feel, and do, what you love—is the sum of what you focus on." - Carl Newport
"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." - George Bernard Shaw
"The pain leaves bit by bit. Be patient. You are healing." - Yasmin Mogahed
"An image I always like is of a circle of knowledge — but as the circle grows, as the diameter increases, so does the circumference that’s in contact with all that darkness outside the circle of light — that ignorance." - Stuart Firestein
"Sometimes the only way to catch your breath is to lose it completely." - Tyler Knott Gregson
"It's the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. Once that belief becomes deep conviction, things begin to happen." - Muhammad Ali
"Love isn't soft, like those poets say. Love has teeth which bite and the wounds never close." - Stephen King
"To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or a rainbow in its climbing, falling colors." - Maya Angelou
"What we need is more people who specialize in the impossible." - Theodore Roethke
"Travelling. It leave you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller." - Ibn Battuta
"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone." - Rose Kennedy
"Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory." - Dr. Seuss
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. – Robert Louis Stevenson